Thursday, November 13, 2008

Boiling Bunnies in Alaska with Greta Van Susteren

Everyone knows that Fox News’ Greta van Susteren is scary. She has a foreign-sounding name, is a socialist, and used to be best friends with William Ayers, to name just three things. But one thing we didn’t know about her is that she is also a Single White Female-like stalker.

Susteren recently followed Sarah Palin all the way up to Alaska, where she crashed on the Palins' couch for like 6 days, during which time she aggressively coveted Sarah’s family, her snow mobile, her spacious Alaskan kitchen, and her sweet, sweet moose cheeks. (She wants to get all up in them moose cheeks.) Van Susteren wistfully questioned Sarah about her cooking, her snow children, her feelings, and her clothes, all the while dying on the inside because she knew that she, Greta Van Susteren, wasn’t Sarah Palin, she never would be Sarah Palin, and no one will ever want to be her, Greta Van Susteren, as much as she, Greta Van Susteren, wants to be Sarah Palin. It’s all very painful to watch, so you should watch some of it on the youtube.

Greta (seated, front) looks exactly like Sarah Palin in this photo.

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