Easy Joke Dept: Rush Limbaugh Was an Adorable Baby

And he loved that teat.

Easy Joke Dept: Ann Coulter Interrupts Hellmouth Hibernation to Check Mail

She needs more Netflix.

Easy Joke Dept: Sad Republican Falls Through Its Own Party Platform

Alas, he didn't bring his bootstraps.

Bailout!

Easy Joke Dept.: Rush Limbaugh Successfully Gets Off Train

I'm very happy for Rush, but I'm kind of surprised that he would be caught dead riding a train. Didn't Lenin invent those? I guess they don't make golf carts big enough these days. Sad.

Easy Joke Dept: Ann Coulter's Mouth Wired Shut by Liberal Orthodontist

All the jokes that could be made about this have likely already been made at least five hundred times each, but whatever, I've got to document this. Aging right-wing show pony Ann Coulter recently broke her jaw (while talking, I presume) and as a result had to have her mouth wired shut. Is this just an elaborate rouse to get her name in the papers in advance of her new scholarly treatise about liberal faggots and the presidents they get elected, Guilty, coming out in January? Get all the pundits drunk off of too much schadenfreude and then kick them in the balls with all your footnotes come interview time? Pretty clever.

Thankfully, Ms. Coulter can still communicate using her neck (it can type!), so it's not a total loss.