Thursday, July 17, 2008

My Camera Phone Will Not Be Denied: The Logo Channel's Sordid Lives Premier Party

I am a popular and singularly significant voice in American blogging. That's why so many people read this blog and why "See Tim Blog" is the most refreshed webpage of countless movers and shakers like my sister in Durham and some guy in South Korea. It is also why I was invited to the recent party celebrating the premier of the Logo channel's new series Sordid Lives. (I'm also friends with one of the "little people" involved in the show's production, but God, I hate to brag) It was held in midtown Manhattan and was sponsored by Skyy Vodka and Sara Lee, naturally.

The show is being billed as a "black comedy about white trash" set mostly in a small town in Texas, and it stars Olivia Newton-John, Caroline Rhea (former host of The Biggest Loser), Leslie Jordan (the really short old guy from Will and Grace), Rue MacClanahan of Golden Girls fame, and, apparently, Alison Janney's boyfriend. A stellar cast, yes, but I was hoping for a little more camp. Anyway, many of these folks were on hand for oggling on the red carpet, and, as ever, my camera phone would not be denied.

The cast and writer/director Del Shores, posing for someone else.

Caroline Rhea, very pregnant, posing with a small assemblage of gays.

Allison Janney (C.J. from West Wing!) showing off her shiny dress. Her lover or brother or friend or bus driver is in the show and she was there to support him and also to get free vodka.

Olivia Newton-John—whose superstar face shines so bright that it cannot be captured properly by a mere Samsung Verizon phone—being interviewed by Entertainment Tonight.

But the biggest thrill of the evening for me was sitting next to Bebe Neuwirth, Dr. Lilith Sternin-Crane from Cheers. Do you know how hard it is to sit through a screening of a show when all you can think about is what you're going to say to Bebe Neuwirth after the show? It's really hard. Anyway, she was really smiley and nice (and freaking beautiful; I'm generally passionately opposed to people wearing berets, but Bebe can do whatever the hell she wants). I told her that I loved her in Tadpole, and she smiled and said "thank you" in a friendly tone that nonetheless seemed to imply, "bye, stalker."

Oh, and the gift bag contained the following: a one-week guest pass to New York Health and Racquet Club; a two-week membership and one private training session at David Barton Gym; a piece of Sara Lee pound cake; and Rue McClanahan's memoir My First Five Husbands, which I'll be auctioning off at my next potluck.

Bebe Neuwirth told me she loves this picture of us.

UPDATE: In my Bebe mania, I forgot to comment on the actual show. Sordid Lives: The Series is actually pretty funny, in an over-the-top, early John Waters kind of way. There's definitely enough pill popping, drinking, inappropriate sex (one scene involves Rue McClanahan and a legless younger man), and general deviancy to keep most heathens happy. Tammy Wynette's daughter Georgette Jones even makes a cameo, playing her mother's ghost talking a suicidal drag queen off a windowsill.

The only part that doesn't work at all--on any level--is the story that follows Ty Williamson, the son/nephew/grandson, etc of the loopy women in Texas. Ty is in LA to follow his dream of becoming an actor and to deal with his sexuality issues. Thing is--and Lord knows I would rather eat my own hand off than to type an unkind word--but the guy playing Ty, Jason Dottley, is a really. Bad. Actor. (Full disclosure: at the premier, he was wearing a bejewelled necklace-type thing around his neck that said "JDott," which didn't predispose me to liking him.) He is supposed to be portraying a guy who is coming to grips with the possibility that he is gay, but, you see, his gayness is visible from space. You can Google-map his gayness. A blind, deaf, retarded armadillo could tell you about his gayness. Better would have been to cast a guy that doesn't scream 'homo' from the moment he hits the screen. But what do I know? I can't even think of an intelligent thing to say to Bebe Neuwirth.


Laurie said...

wow---I can't believe I was referenced in one of your posts! next time maybe you can add that I am cool or beautiful or funny so I don't sound like I have no life.

Unknown said...

My hair stylist is gonna flip when I tell him about this. No kidding. His name is Tim, too. He's been bugging me to watch the movie for about two years now. Of course I haven't even considered renting it.