Wednesday, July 30, 2008
Cat Chat: Introducing Princess Chunk
My boyfriend Jimmy has always dreamed of having a fat cat to fuck with. He's been trying to fatten my cat Stella up for the past 11 years to no avail (because of all the vomiting). But this cat, this ginormous mound of fur-covered meat called Princess Chunk, featured on the cover of today's New York Post, is 44 pounds of pure unadulterated joy that already has Jimmy walking into walls with excitement.
The Chunk currently resides at a New Jersey animal shelter and is in need of a home. If not for my fears that the Princess would waste no time in devouring my Stella before turning to me to ask about dessert and a good port wine, I'd be on the phone talking adoption right now. Someone needs to act fast, though. Those malevolent shelter volunteers are putting Chunk on a diet (1 percent milk!) that could compromise her very essence.
Save the Chunk!