Right-Wing Trannie Ann Coulter Loves Right-Wing Blacks

Ann Coulter is the right wing's #1 trannie. She is also Fox News's #1 trannie, the Internet's #1 trannie, and the #1 trannie of nine out of ten dentists (that other guy prefers Orly Taitz). Anyway, when a top-tier aging right-wing trannie talks about black folks, people listen. Because it's bound to be hilarious.

So Ann claims that "our blacks" are so much better than "their blacks", which is self-evidently true, because, come on, Herman Cain? Alan Keyes? Allen West? These are grade-A, top-shelf super-blacks who are not at all crazy or dumb or in any way sociopathic. There's also Michael Steele, who has the best porn name in American politics, though he's disappointingly coherent and likable. But still, he's ten times better than "their blacks" because he tastes like dark, small government chocolate.

In conclusion, Ann Coulter's neck still, even after all these years, looks like the shaft of an erect penis.

Easy Joke Dept: Ann Coulter Interrupts Hellmouth Hibernation to Check Mail

She needs more Netflix.

Ann Coulter Attacks Single Mother

All right, I know I've been dedicating a LOT of precious blog space recently to Coulter coverage, but, you know, it's not my fault if she insists on causing a scene everywhere she goes. If she tries to drop-kick or strangle an innocent single mother, I have to cover it. That's what a blog is for.

Jesus, will her stupid f**king press junket ever end?

Shootin' It: In Which Jimmy and Tim Briefly Discuss the Issues of Our Times

Jimmy: So did you see that clip from The View?

Tim: You mean with Ann Coulter's Neck?

J: Yeah.

T: Mmm-hmmm.

J: They kind of tore her a new one.

T: Yeah, I guess, but why doesn't anyone ever call her on her moralizing bullshit? I mean, I know there's tons of stuff to call her on, but Ms. Small Government was on the Mike Hukabee show the other day talking about the evils of sodomy and how the government should stop people from doing it because, I guess, Jesus says so. Why doesn't anyone ask her if she's a virgin? She's not married. She's nearly 80 years old. We all know she's had all sorts of nasty sex, even with Democrats. So why the fuck is she moralizing about sodomy? Jesus God may not like sodomy, but he's pretty much on record saying he disapproves of dumb whores having premarital sex.

J: Wait. Guys want to fuck her?

T: Yes! Bill Maher fucked her, that nasty pig.

J: Wow. Probably in the ass, too.


Thank you, goodnight!

Things I'd Rather Do Than Ever Read Another NYT Column by Bono

Folks, this is how horrific Bono's column in the New York Times was yesterday. I would rather do any of the following than to ever have to experience that type of thing again:

1. Read a New York Times op-ed by Ann Coulter.
2. Watch Ann Coulter flirt with and discuss sodomy with Mike Huckabee.
3. Watch Ann Coulter take a shower. (shiver)
4. Listen to Ann Coulter having an orgasm.
5. Watch Ann Coulter mud wrestle Larry King nude.
6. Make love to Ann Coulter.
7. Rent an apartment from Ann Coulter.
8. See Ann Coulter’s secret freckle.
9. Visit an Ann Coulter fan club meeting.
10. Listen to Ann Coulter’s new single “Baby Mama’s Baby (Gonna Kill You Maybe)”

I'm not kidding.

Easy Joke Dept: Ann Coulter's Mouth Wired Shut by Liberal Orthodontist

All the jokes that could be made about this have likely already been made at least five hundred times each, but whatever, I've got to document this. Aging right-wing show pony Ann Coulter recently broke her jaw (while talking, I presume) and as a result had to have her mouth wired shut. Is this just an elaborate rouse to get her name in the papers in advance of her new scholarly treatise about liberal faggots and the presidents they get elected, Guilty, coming out in January? Get all the pundits drunk off of too much schadenfreude and then kick them in the balls with all your footnotes come interview time? Pretty clever.

Thankfully, Ms. Coulter can still communicate using her neck (it can type!), so it's not a total loss.